When Things Don't Go As Planned

So I have been in Canada for a couple of weeks now, and I will be going back to the Philippines in less than two weeks! Time is flying by so fast. Things have definately not gone the way I had envisioned it to be. Not that I had any big plans - just priorities, but even some of those didn't push through. My cousin told me something funny the other day that really made me think. She said: "Do you know how to make God laugh?" and of course, I said "No, how?" and she said "Show Him your plans!". That definitely made me laugh, because it is so true! We make all these plans for ourselves, thinking that they are God's plans too. Not that there is anything wrong with making plans - because it says in His word that a wise person makes plans. But sometimes when things don't go our way we think God has left us or is punishing us... or we doubt Him. Which I guess is natural, after all, we are human. The truth is though, is that God has the perfect blueprint for our lives - now, there are going to be hills and valleys, but He will always be in control because He has planned every little detail. Let's not forget his promise in Jeremiah 29:11.

I guess I have had to meditate on that for the past couple of weeks. There has been some things that have really discouraged me, really challenged me. I am definitely out of my comfort zone and not in my element. When it comes down to it, it's all a battle of the mind - what I choose to believe about myself and about God. Don't get me wrong, I am so blessed with this trip. I get to spend time with my family and friends, and have rest among other things.

I guess all I have really been able to do here is spend time with people - talk to them. I have just met so many different kinds of people, so many different Christians, with different convictions and levels of understanding. I have learned so much by just listening and not even verbilizing my opinions or thoughts. There have also been people who God has brought into my life at this time to minister to - who ask me questions and want know more about God. It amazes me how He would use me when I feel so weak. It makes me realize how unworthy I am and how richly blessed at the same time. It's so true that it will glorify Him more to use us when we in and of ourselves are not capable - because it's about Him and his capabilities, not ours.

I don't know what is in store for me in the next week and a half I have left here in Canada - or for the next year in the Philippines for that matter! It is scary if I really think about it. But I guess the point is - I am not supposed to know those things. I am not supposed to know what my blueprint looks like. I am not supposed to know when a hill or valley will be coming up. That's for Him to know and for me to rely on Him more for. Through this, He will reveal himself more to me - His grace, His faithfullness, His love, His power... His personality! That's what I am looking forward to, that's what makes me excited for what is up ahead. It's not going to be easy, but through good and bad - there's something new I will learn about Him, something new to love Him more for.